I was lying here, in my bed (trying to get to bed early again, stupid 8 a.m. psych lab) when many thoughts were starting to trickle inside my mind. It was like a bunch of little streams that eventually all combined in a lake. I would invite you to come swim in this lake (oh wow that just sounded creepy, nice intro Jamie). But let me share with you what I was thinking about. I'll give you a hint, John Cena (Orgasm) has lot's of this, physically though...
No, it's not lot's of money - it's Strength. I was thinking about how sometimes the people who we consider to be weak or unstable are actually some of the strongest people. From the outside it's easy to judge and easily dismiss their sometimes outlandish behavior as just being desperate. But a couple examples came to mind.
Being that girl who keeps going back to the asshole boyfriend - Ladies, I'm sure you've all been here or has had a friend that's been here. If you've had a friend that is like this, you probably are just about ready to scream about how stupid she is and wondering why can't she shake them. You might think of her as being pathetic. And I can see why you would think that, it's hard to watch your best friend be broken so many times. And ladies, if you've ever been that girl, I applaud you. See, being in a relationship with a complete dick is something that wares on you. How do these girls display strength you might ask? Well, I think in a number of ways. Sure, they might be in denial (I know I was) but strength does show in mysterious ways. The first being of having the strength to not give up. Perseverance is a great quality to have. How hard is it to wake up and go through the day knowing that this guy is treating you like shit. He disrespects you, but you believe that you can change him. This belief, this faith in the belief is strong. It might not be right, as you can't always change people, but the strength is there in the belief. It takes courage to constantly put yourself out their in the batting cage without a helmet. Crying herself to sleep every night, the intense verbal arguments, the things you try to do to please him but comes up empty. It can be draining, but the girl will still go on anyway, fighting for something she believes in. That takes courage. Fighting for love takes courage, even if it's a lost cause because the guy just truly doesn't care. It's a personal thing to go through, but I guarantee all ladies come out of this stronger in some way.
The college freshman - I always tell people there is nothing more scary than being a college freshman. For me it was that way anyway. But I've talked to many people, and many people agree. A lot of people see college freshman as being weak or naive, and in some ways they are and we were. Think about it though, you live 18 years of your life with your family in a little comfort bubble, sheltered from the real world. And in three short months from your high school graduation to your first day, that world as you know it is over. You have to start fresh thousands of people you never met, living on your own. You pursue the world on your dreams, and that takes courage. And it's not easy at first. Making friends might come hard for some people, or maybe it's the adjusting to the hard courses. And the thing is that no one ever really admits they don't like college in that first month. All you ever hear from people is 'I love it,' even when they might be having a hard time. I had a hard time at first, but after adjusting, I loved the independence. This change takes courage, never forget that. If you ever think of yourself as being weak, think of a change you've went through. Courage can be found everywhere. I applaud you, college freshman.
Anorexics - Let me start off first by saying I do not approve of this disorder in anyway, nor do I ever encourage it. If you're feeling bad about your weight, I always encourage you to talk to someone, communication is key. Anyways though, yes, anorexics. I've stumbled on a lot of blogs out there in which people blog about how their trying to be this image of perfect. It's hard to read, but anorexics are brave people. Do you have any idea how hard it is to simply just not eat? To give up or cut out most of your food, that takes some serious will power. This is also fighting something they believe in, and even it's a distorted version of 'perfect', they somehow want to better themselves. And concealing the idea for the dignity of themselves, this pride also takes courage. Although I cannot condone what you do to your bodies, I respect your courage, anorexics.
You might all disagree with this post. You might say, Jamie, doesn't leaving you're asshole boyfriend, being honest about you're true hard feelings of being a freshman, or turning away from anorexia and getting help take more courage? And you would be right, all those things can take more courage to do and are what many see as the right thing to do. Although that is not what this post is about. It's about looking at things from a new angle, trying to see what's on the inside of these tough situations. I love the underdog, and will always hope good things for them. I just wanted to share how stereotypically weak people are actually strong in their own way.
I'm worried about me posting the thing about anorexia. I just want to let you all know that I do not support it, please don't take it the wrong way. I'm just saying I can sympathize. If any of you are anorexic, please, please talk to someone. Your life won't always be seen through the eyes of thin forever, I promise things can get better.
On a lighter note, time for the gratitude diary. And tomorrow, well technically today :) is Friday! Woohoo! What's on your agenda for the weekend, bloggers? Let me know!
1) Family - I don't think I can put into words what having family just being there for me means to me. I'm blessed.
2) Grocery shopping - whenever I grocery shop I truly feel like a Mom. I love it. I can't wait to have kids someday, and have the cute pregnant belly! So yes haha, I'm thankful for grocery stores I suppose
3) Last music class :)! I did love music, I find classical music to be so relaxing to listen too, but I'm so thankful that class is over with for the semester haha.
Goodnight, Loves. My eyes are literally closing as I type this. Need... sleep... now... :).