Monday, December 6, 2010

Dildo Bobbins!

Happy Monday. As if there couldn't be two more contradicting words in one phrase, Happy Monday takes the cake. However, for myself, I freaking love Mondays. I should be more specific, rather I love Monday Mornings. There's something magical about the morning (cue inspirational classical Beethoven concerto music here) .  I feel like anything is possible, that anything I set my mind to can be accomplished.  Maybe it's the freshness of a new week (literally freshness, I go outside and inhale the morning air, talk about fresh).  To be honest, I'm so lazy on a Sunday that I yearn for the chance to do something productive.  So Monday's aren't actually that bad for me. Wait a second, that sounded too negative. Let's re-frame that (give me a break, I'm in the process of changing my mind frame lol).  Monday's are good for me.

And on this Monday, I found myself really studying my reflection in the mirror.  I was trying to figure out what I looked like from another person's perspective.  Like I was pretending I didn't know me, and then I tried to give myself a first impression. (I actually walked by the mirror several times, looked up and said 'hello' like I was meeting someone for the first time).  It was kind of a weird feeling, like an almost out of body experience.  But then again, it's impossible to know what others are thinking about you, even so impossible to guess.

But as I looked in the mirror, I find myself attractive.  But I always wonder if that's me being biased towards myself.  I guess when I tried to pretend I didn't know me, I gave myself the cute factor.  Is that being conceited? I hope not. I don't think it is. I think it's actually pretty damn courageous to look at yourself in the mirror, to face yourself.  Well for me it was anyway, because as I looked closer, I did see another thing: unsureness.  I'm a very indecisive person, so this was on target.  I did see something else though that made me proud, and it was an inner strength. It was a determination, a will to keep on going. And believe me, I'm not the toughest person by any sorts of comparison, but I could see it.  So I came to a conclusion - We all have inner strength, you just have to look hard enough to find it.  For me, this was an actual LITERALLY looking hard enough in my eyes to find it.  But it was there. It might have been hidden by the unsureness and even fear, but it was there.  You just have to look at yourself and say, let's do this.

So my question of the day to you is - What do you see when you look in the mirror? Can you see your inner strength?

Alright enough being deep for a moment.  So after I looked at myself in the mirror, it was time to shower haha.  I always play music when I shower, something that I can dance to.  This also brings me to another self-discovery - I love to hip-hop dance/belly dance.  Seriously before I shower I have these mad dance sessions alone.  I always try to roll my stomach (even though I probably look like I'm humping the air).  And then I noticed today when Chris Brown's Transform Ya (or is it Transformer?) came on, I pretty much turned into a porn star.  I was on the floor gyrating my hips.  Oh the things we do when we're alone.  And don't lie to me bloggers! Don't tell me you've never busted out your own dance parties, actually I bet you all do it quite often.  Hey, let's make this another question of the day - What kind of dance moves do you sporadically do?  And if you don't know the answer to that question, I want all of you to download Chris Brown - I Can Transform Ya and see what your body does in reaction to it.  (Yes that is a confirmed answer, I have just yahoo-ed it.  And yes, I yahoo things).

So yes that was my Monday morning - Reflecting on my inner emotions and belly-dancing.  All before noon.  Jamie, you are so productive!! Now, onto the Gratitude Journal (if you don't know what this is, refer to post below suckas!)

1) Free Samples - Today something that made me happy was the Chinese lady in the mall food court that was handing out free samples.  They were delicious. I freaking love free samples, everyone should give out free samples of everything.

2) The Little Things a Mom Does - I guess the last time my Mom was in my car, she put a Christmas CD in there so I would hear it eventually. I was flipping to my next CD and then I hear Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree. It really made me smile, and in the Christmas Spirit. Ho Ho Ho!

3) Tyler - My friend in my psych class. Well, were not really friends, more like acquaintances.  We sit next to each other, and  my professor always comes around with an attendance sheet.  He signed it first and handed it to me, and he noticed that I didn't have my pen out right away to sign it, so without saying a word, he just hands me the attendance sheet and his pen (woah crazy run-on sentence).  I know it's so minor, but it was a touching gesture that needed no words.  My heart smiled.  Like I've said before, politeness really warms my heart haha.  If I had been on my period, I probably would've cried and hugged the guy.

See you tomorrow loves, sooner if the surfs up ;). I don't know what that means exactly but one of my teachers always used to say it.  And it's fun to say, try it. AND DO YOU ALSO KNOW WHAT'S FUN TO SAY!?!! Dildo Bobbins. Try it. Me and my one friend use that as an alias. Dildo Bobbins, funny and catchy.

Haha but for real, peace <3.

3 comments:

  1. Thanks for the comment! Interesting and thoughtful post. Its really interesting to look yourself in the mirror with an analytical eye. You always end up noticing something you hadn't really noticed before.

    and i love to get down when chris brown comes on. haha love that song! i'm your newest follower!
    stay well,
    allie
    http://www.alliemargaret.blogspot.com

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  2. Your comment on my post made me laugh out loud! There's nothing wrong with dancing around the house sometimes-it can seriously be the best therapy!
    xo
    Rach

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  3. I find myself attractive when I look in the mirror, of course i'm not perfect but I know i'm attractive. And if anyone thinks that is being conceited then so be it, I'm conceited.

    I listen to a lot of rock music and picture myself wickedly playing guitar which led me to actually buy a guitar. I'm not wickedly playing any time soon except in my mind lol

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